Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Zombie Apocolypse


Ok, so some guy is saying that the world is gonna end on Saturday. Cool beans. Just got my degree and everything and gonna get roasted by the rapture. What shitty luck. Even if the rapture doesn't happen, it got me thinking of a zombie apocalypse. No amount of video games and movies could possibly prepare me for the mental strain and paranoia associated with a friggin Zombie Apocalypse. There would be so much to do and so much to prepare. Though I initially thought it would be fun to have anything at my disposal to use such as fortifying my house and loading up with a room full of ammo. This would depend however on what type of zombie we are talking about. I would like to touch upon these types of zombies.

1. I am Legend Zombies

OK. First kind is the one from I am Legend. Smart as hell, pretty damn fast, but their weakness in UV rays from the sun. This would be pretty interesting yet ridiculously scary. I could grill some burgers during the day and feed the ducks by the pond if I wanted. But come nightfall, I'm def. chillin in a bathtub like Will Smith did. 
  • Advantage: Fortify house and hunt for supplies during the day with no chance of getting caught off guard by a zombie (for the most part)
  • Disadvantage: At night, my house would have to be secure as hell. I want guns in the fridge, guns in the bathroom. Barbed wire and Steel doors. Can't be too careful!


2. 28 Days Later/28 Weeks Later Zombies
Probably the worst of the worst. These guys/gals wander for days and weeks looking for any sign of human life. God help you if they spot you too cus they can run the 100 meter dash faster than Ussain Bolt himself. (Imagine him as a zombie? Friggin nuts scary!) Once you're caught too, you get demolished and eaten alive...Not the best way to go either.
  • Advantage: If you survive long enough you may just live to see the zombie population die off. You would need to be in a remote location though, like in Vermont or something. How about a ski resort? You got your hot cocoa and ski lifts. Shootin zombies from the chairlift and then eating clam chowder at the summit lodge. Sick life.
  • Disadvantage: You are constantly hiding and have to be in great shape to outrun these suckers. finding supplies would be life threatening and scary as hell.


3. Shaun of the Dead Zombies
You're pretty much in the clear and are gonna have a good time if you get these kind of zombies. You can be a fat-ass and still out run these guys. They are slow moving and dumb, and also easy to disable.
  • Advantage:  Getting supplies and weapons would be easy as outrunning a turtle. With enough ammo, you could easily build a nasty defense shelter and take the zombie world by storm
  • Disadvantage: If they do find your home base, they will all group together and stay there. They don't wander too much.

I hope none of you think I'm crazy for blogging about this, but instead thank me for it. People have fire escape plans and tornado warning procedures...so why not a Zombie Apocolypse scenario? 


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